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Thank you for being there

Discussion in 'English Only' started by cfu507, Aug 18, 2007.

  1. cfu507

    cfu507 Senior Member

    Hebrew
    Hi,
    When you are depressed and one of your friends encouragesyou, you tell him: "Thank you for being there for me". Why do you say "there" if he is here, sitting next to you?
    Thank you
     
  2. tinlizzy

    tinlizzy Senior Member

    Iowa
    USA - English
    If you are depressed at that moment and your friend is sitting next to you then the phrase would be "Thank you for being here for me."

    If the event has past, even if he is now sitting next to you, you would say "Thank you for being there for me.

    Here and there are indicators for when the depression took place not your friend's location.
     
  3. Packard

    Packard Senior Member

    USA, English
    There is the understanding that the full meaning of the phrase is:

    Thank you for being there [to help me if I needed it]...

    Thank you for being there [to lend emotional support if I needed it]...


    I've always took that phrase to mean more than the just physically being "there".
     
  4. nichec

    nichec Senior Member

    Chinese(Taiwan)/English(AE)
  5. panjandrum

    panjandrum PongoMod

    Belfast, Ireland
    English-Ireland (top end)
    If this is a particular, limited crisis, then "here for me" would be fine - assuming the friend is right beside you.
    If this relates to more general support and friendship, then it has to be "there for me" - wherever and whenever I needed you.

    Which is another way of saying more or less what has been said already.
     
  6. cfu507

    cfu507 Senior Member

    Hebrew
    The link was very helpful, Thank you dear


    Choosing "being there" or "being here" is not related to my friend's location. So, I should say "thank you for being here" even when I talk with her/him on the phone and we are from different cuntries.
     
  7. panjandrum

    panjandrum PongoMod

    Belfast, Ireland
    English-Ireland (top end)
    As in my earlier post, if the person isn't sitting right beside me I would use there, not here. The pull of the standard expression always there for me, is very strong indeed. On the phone, it would seem really odd to say "Thanks for being here for me."
     
  8. cfu507

    cfu507 Senior Member

    Hebrew
    Thank you panj(i)
     
  9. Arrius

    Arrius Senior Member

    Spain
    English, UK
    I first heard the expression "Thank you for always being there for me", and variations of it, extremely frequently, in the Aussie soap opera "Neighbours", where everybody was eternally talking about their "re-lai-shunships". The there didn't mean any particular place any more than the the da in German da sein, which is just to be present or to exist. "Being there for me" should not be taken literally and just implies moral and possibly material support which could be done from another continent.
    You might, however, thank somebody "for being here" for you, if he had made a long journey to support and comfort you, say, at a time of bereavement.
     

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