à travers votre plume je rêve en couleur

Agent Literary

Senior Member
England, English
Bonjour à tous,

The following is a note sent to an author in praise of his/her work. It's giving me some difficulties to translate:

"Merci beaucoup à travers votre plume je rêve en couleur."

My try:

"Thank you so much - your writing has given colour to my dreams."

The problem, as I see it, is that I'd like to keep the "pen" idea, but it's difficult to do this without sounding very twee and naff in English. Also, I'm not sure that the sentence as I've translated is really immediately understandable. Perhaps "given life"? I don't know.

Any help you can give me would be much appreciated (as ever) :)
 
  • pieanne

    Senior Member
    Belgium/French
    I'm afraid your right, pieanne :(



    I like the structure of "thanks to..., I'm now dreaming in colour". I hadn't thought of that. But, "penmanship" is a little heavy too.

    Any other sugestions?
    I thought of "penmanship" too, but I think it refers to the way people form the letters (cf calligraphy), not to the literary quality of the text
     

    Agent Literary

    Senior Member
    England, English
    I thought of "penmanship" too, but I think it refers to the way people form the letters (cf calligraphy), not to the literary quality of the text
    I think "penmanship" is more the profession of writing itself, but it may be calligraphy too. Either way I don't think it works here.
     

    Agent Literary

    Senior Member
    England, English
    (you pen colours my dreams?)
    At first, I thought this could be good, but on relection I think the verb "to colour" has connotations of "to stain", "to tarnish" and "to taint".

    I'm now trying to do something with the idea of a brush painting the dream in colour.

    "With each brushstroke you have painted a little more colour into my dreams."

    I'm getting too far from the original.

    Any Anglophones around? (Not that there's anything wrong with Francophones! Some of my best friends are Francophones :D)
     

    Agent Literary

    Senior Member
    England, English
    Only some frenchmen here ;)

    "Your pen is a brush wich sketchs the colors of my dreams"
    Thanks Findiel. There are some serious mixed metaphors here! :D I'm pretty sure you can't sketch with a brush, but maybe you can if your brush is a pen. But then is it a colour pen? Would you do a colour-sketch of a dream with a brush-pen or a pen-brush? Sorry. I've confused myself :confused:
     

    Agent Literary

    Senior Member
    England, English
    How about 'your pen has lent/given colour to my dreams'? The figurative meaning of 'pen' would be clear from the context.
    Do you think it would be clear? The sentence stands alone (although within the context of an internet FAQ page for the author).

    I think I'll go with your suggestion, Suehil, unless I hear anything better before the day is out.

    Thanks everyone :)
     

    dunescratcheur

    Senior Member
    French, English
    Bonjour à tous,

    The following is a note sent to an author in praise of his/her work. It's giving me some difficulties to translate:

    "Merci beaucoup à travers votre plume je rêve en couleur."

    My try:

    "Thank you so much - your writing has given colour to my dreams."

    The problem, as I see it, is that I'd like to keep the "pen" idea, but it's difficult to do this without sounding very twee and naff in English. Also, I'm not sure that the sentence as I've translated is really immediately understandable. Perhaps "given life"? I don't know.

    Any help you can give me would be much appreciated (as ever) :)

    Thanks to your writing, my dreams are in colour.
     

    Nicomon

    Senior Member
    Français, Québec ♀
    My try :

    "Your lively pen has coloured my dreams"

    Incidentally... penmanship really is calligraphy, as pieanne said.


    Edit : Je viens de remarquer que tu n'aimes pas le verbe "to colour". Mais peut-être qu'en ajoutant "lively", la connotation négative n'y est plus?
     
    < Previous | Next >
    Top