없어서였다

[idialegre]

Hi Everybody. In the novel 레몬 by 권여선, the speaker is describing how she saw a teenage girl descend the steps of a building, how saw the girl, looked away, and then looked again.

시선을 피한 것도 다시 본 것도, 나로서는 그렇게 하지 않을 수 없어서였다.

I'm not sure about the exact meaning of 없어서였다. Does it mean, "I avoided looking, then looked again, because I couldn't do otherwise?

What is the difference between this sentence and the following one?

시선을 피한 것도 다시 본 것도, 나로서는 그렇게 하지 않을 수 없었다.

Thanks for any help!

 

[SeasnailSalad]

Yes, you got that right.

You can think of it as the difference between “cannot help doing” and “cannot help but do”. Its distinction is so subtle that both are interchangeable in meaning.

The very subtle difference I think would be that the former tries to explain to the readers what is going on—it’s more like colloquialism, while the latter simply states things in a matter of fact manner—plain, unemotional. This is what I feel like, and some Koreans may not agree on this but just say they are simply interchangeable.

 

[idialegre]

Thank you!

 

[Tomato potato]

Additional comment about the difference:
.., 나로서는 그렇게 하지 않을 수 없어서였다. => .., because I could not help doing it.
.., 나로서는 그렇게 하지 않을 수 없었다. => .., but I could not help doing it.

We skip "왜냐하면" usually in "왜냐하면 .. ~서였다." expression.

 

[idialegre]

Thanks!