breath heavy and coarse

[Quantz]

This a sex scene with unease.

"The thick knot of desire in his throat made his breath heavy and coarse."

I'm juggling without being satisfied.

Avec ce nœud épais du désir au fond de sa gorge, il sentait sa respiration lourde et oppressée.

 

[Micia93]

"Ce noeud épais de désir au fond de sa gorge alourdissait sa respiration et la rendait animale" ? (si on considère "coarse" comme "grossier", vulgaire")

 

[Kelly B]

If it's any use, I'd say synonyms in English for coarse would be harsh, rough. I don't know which French adjectives are appropriate here, because he isn't ill....

 

[Quantz]

I would say âpre…

 

[Micia93]

"une respiration âpre" ?

 

[carolineR]

"The thick knot of desire in his throat made his breath heavy and coarse."
le noeud du désir lui serrait la gorge, il haletait, le souffle court

 

[Quantz]

C'est une possibilité, mais "haletant" me semble moins juste qu'"âpre" (coarse).