clause

Wren Cartman

New Member
Chinese
Hello.

I saw the paragraph from a reading test.

"Consumer marketing becomes stronger because the messages are developed based on employees’ behavior and attitudes, as well as on the company’s strengths and capabilities. This process can result in a more distinct advertising idea because marketers are more likely to create a message that’s unique to the company.
Perhaps even more important, by taking employees into account, a company can avoid creating a message that doesn’t resonate with staff or, worse, one that builds resentment.
"

Can I change the last sentence to "Perhaps even more important is that a company, by taking employees into account, can avoid creating a message that doesn't resonate with staff or a worse message that builds resentment"

Is it okay if I paraphrase it with Clause? I don't know why the author separates the phrase with comma, like "...staff or, worse, one that...'

Thank you so much.
 
  • Is it okay if I paraphrase it with Clause?
    No, it's unnatural.
    I don't know why the author separates the phrase with comma, like "...staff or, worse, one that...'
    "Worse" there means that a company might end up creating an even worse message. It's set off by two commas because it's parenthetical. Here's how you should read that fragment:

    ... a company can avoid creating (1) a message that doesn’t resonate with staff or, (which would be) worse, (2) one that builds resentment.
     
    Perhaps even more important, by taking employees into account, a company can avoid creating a message that doesn’t resonate with staff or, worse, one that builds resentment."

    Can I change the last sentence to "Perhaps even more important is that a company, by taking employees into account, can avoid creating a message that doesn't resonate with staff or a worse message that builds resentment"
    The original sentence does not say "a worse message", and does not intend to say that. You added that.

    The original sentence says that "creating a message that builds resentment" would be worse than
    "creating a message that doesn't resonate with the stuff".
     
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