declinarán en ti todas las brumas

[Zsuzscsini]

Could anyone translate this poem for me? Thanks a lot!

Enrique Badosa
Canto de las cinco estaciones
Elegía en Enero

…
y III
DECLINARÁN en ti todas las brumas. Nada.
Si te confío el aire, te cortará su espada.
Si pienso en tu amargura, podría entristecerte.
Tuvimos la esperanza, y no quiero perderte.

 

[CharlesTESOL]

Although I'm no poet, I'll have a go:

and III
You will fade away in the mist. Nothing.
If I confide in the wind, its sword will cut you down.
If I think about your bitterness, it might make you sad.
We once had hope, so I don't want you to lose your way.

My apologies to Enrique Badosa for any poetic licence I've taken.

 

[jackaustralia]

Fantastic translation although the last stanza sounds a bit strange. Why not just something literal (as i do not want/care to lose you) although i concede it's not overly poetic.

 

[CharlesTESOL]

Because the word is perderte, not perder. I believe "perderse" means to "get lost", so my interpretation is that the writer doesn't want the person to lose his/her way as they separate. So, to me the writer isn't trying to hold onto anything. At first I wrote, "I don't want you to get lost" but that sounded like it could be interpreted as "get lost" in the sense of "largate."

 

[jprr]

Because the word is perderte, not perder. I believe "perderse" means to "get lost", so my interpretation is that the writer doesn't want the person to lose his/her way as they separate. At first I wrote, "I don't want you to get lost" but that sounded like it could be interpreted as "get lost" in the sense of "largate."

This would probably be "no quiero que te pierdas"
"no quiero perderte" is a quite common sentence in songs and poems ... I don't want to loose you / I don't want we never will be together anymore (just correct my english please)

 

[CharlesTESOL]

Thanks.

I'm still attached to my interpretation, even if it might not be correct. Is there a chance that my interpretaion is correct?

I don't want to loose lose you / I don't want that we us to never will not be together anymore (just correct my English please)

 

[jprr]

Thanks.

I'm still attached to my interpretation, even if it might not be correct. Is there a chance that my interpretaion is correct?

I won't bet but ask a native speaker and let us know.
Thanks for corrections.

 

[CharlesTESOL]

Ahh, I didn't notice that you weren't a native speaker! OK, I'll stick with my interpretation until further notice from a native speaker from Spain, since that is where the poet is from. And actually, he is from Catalonia, so perhaps the poem was first written in Catalan and then translated into Spanish.