enabling parents ?

mink-shin

Senior Member
Korean - Korea, Republic of
i readed a post of a blogger posting her parenting.

I cannot understand what's the bold text meaning.

『I was so sure if I kept stepping in, that they would grow up.
But they only stayed the same.
And I saw that I needed to step away and let my baby find their way.
Being over-involved is no longer parenting.
It's enabling...』

question 1) is "it" in this case pronoun directing parenting?

question 2) what is enabling in the parenting? i think enabling is making someone's child free. is it right for me to think that?
 
  • I thought that might be the case. I think I would reverse the word order in the previous sentence, saying something like. "Parenting is not (really) about being over-involved. It is about enabling." (Meaning that it is more about enabling / helping the child to develop).
     

    Glasguensis

    Signal Modulation
    English - Scotland
    I disagree - this is a psychological use of the word "enabling" which means to allow someone to be dependent rather than autonomous. It is often used when referring to the family or friends of an addict who pick up the pieces sufficiently that the addict doesn't suffer the full consequences of their actions. In this case it's saying that the parent is enabling the child to remain dependent on the parent rather than doing things for itself.
     

    velisarius

    Senior Member
    British English (Sussex)
    I don't think that's what they mean by "enabling".

    "Enabling" here means reinforcing undesirable behaviour (by going along with or giving in to the child's own inclination). As Glas says.

    "It"="being over-involved".

    (crossed)
     

    mink-shin

    Senior Member
    Korean - Korea, Republic of
    I disagree - this is a psychological use of the word "enabling" which means to allow someone to be dependent rather than autonomous. It is often used when referring to the family or friends of an addict who pick up the pieces sufficiently that the addict doesn't suffer the full consequences of their actions. In this case it's saying that the parent is enabling the child to remain dependent on the parent rather than doing things for itself.
    oh, i think it was so stupid for me to think of the word "enabling" as an word having good nuance, thank you very much. I totally misunderstood.
     

    mink-shin

    Senior Member
    Korean - Korea, Republic of
    I don't think that's what they mean by "enabling".

    "Enabling" here means reinforcing undesirable behaviour (by going along with or giving in to the child's own inclination). As Glas says.

    "It"="being over-involved".

    (crossed)
    yes i totally understand now. thank you.
     
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