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Kozmiknat

New Member
Spanish and Catalan
Hi, I'd like to know if the following sentence makes sense:

Therefore, this competence facilitates not only the expression and communication but also the perception, understanding and enrichment from different realities and productions from the artistic and cultural world.

Thanks in advance
 
  • FromPA

    Senior Member
    USA English
    Not to me.
    Therefore, this competence facilitates not only the expression and communication (of what?), but also the perception, understanding and enrichment (of what?) from different realities and productions from the artistic and cultural world.

    The underlined section doesn't make any sense to me. I don't know what it refers to. Maybe you should try using two sentences.
     

    Suzie166

    Member
    English - UK
    It's grammatically incorrect to begin a sentence with 'therefore'. You will hear a lot of english speakers do it, and I'm sure some will argue that it's fine, but if we're being strict, then it should never be used at the beginning of a sentence. It should follow the subject and be between commas, as follows:

    This competence, therefore, facilitates......etc etc

    The rest of the sentence isn't quite correct in terms of using appropriate prepositions to make it clear what you're referring to, but without any context it's difficult to correct it.
    I think maybe you're trying to put too many nouns into one sentence! It's possible to do this in a grammatically correct way, but I'm not sure that you'll get your point across succinctly.
    Can you give us more context?
     

    FromPA

    Senior Member
    USA English
    It's grammatically incorrect to begin a sentence with 'therefore'. You will hear a lot of english speakers do it, and I'm sure some will argue that it's fine, but if we're being strict, then it should never be used at the beginning of a sentence. It should follow the subject and be between commas, as follows:

    This competence, therefore, facilitates......etc etc
    You're right. I completely disagree with your position on using "therefore" at the beginning of a sentence.
     

    Suzie166

    Member
    English - UK
    You're right. I completely disagree with your position on using "therefore" at the beginning of a sentence.
    Fair enough, to each their own!
    I think it is pretty much accepted now, but in good ol' England I was always taught that it was incorrect, just as it would be wrong to use 'and' or 'but' to begin a sentence.

    I knew someone would disagree ;)
     

    Kozmiknat

    New Member
    Spanish and Catalan
    Here is the context: I'm talking about key competencies in education, specifically about the artitic and cultural competence:



    The learning of a foreign language contributes to the development of this competence when the linguistic models used contain linguistic productions with a cultural component. Therefore, this competence facilitates not only the (linguistic)expression and communication but also the perception, understanding and enrichment from different realities and productions from the artistic and cultural world.



    Maybe I should rewrite the paragraph...




     

    Suzie166

    Member
    English - UK


    The learning of a foreign language contributes to the development of this competence when the linguistic models used contain linguistic productions with a cultural component. Therefore, this competence facilitates not only the (linguistic)expression and communication but also the perception, understanding and enrichment from different realities and productions from the artistic and cultural world.
    Ah I see, that helps a little. I think perhaps you might need to re-write the paragraph, just to be sure you're putting the right point across.

    Here's my attempt (assuming I've correctly understood your intentions, which I may not have!):

    The learning of a foreign language aids the development of this competence when the linguistic models used contain linguistic productions (are you sure you want to say linguistic twice? I also think perhaps 'productions' is not quite the word you're looking for, unless it's specific terminology) with a cultural component. This competence, therefore, not only facilitates linguistic expression and communication, but also contributes to a wider perception of, and enrichment by, different realities and productions from the cultural/artistic sphere.

    As you're looking at it again, just a couple of points to think about; just be sure you're not doubling-up on meaning.
    'Expression' and 'communication' are very similar in meaning in some contexts such as this, so if you do mean two different things, then there may be a more suitable word you could use, or perhaps you might want to say just one of the two.

    Similarly, 'perception' and 'understanding' are, at times, interchangeable, so you may want to differentiate more clearly, or just use one of them.

    Finally, the 'artistic world' could be perceived to be an intrinsic part of the 'cultural world'. Art and culture are inextricably linked, so I just wonder whether it's necessary to say both? 'Cultural' encompasses 'artistic' I think, so you could just use that if you wanted to.

    That said, please feel free to completely ignore me, I'm just offering up an opinion! If you definitely want to use all of those words then there would be nothing grammatically wrong with that, it just disrupts the flow of the paragraph a little bit.

    Hope that helps!
     

    Kozmiknat

    New Member
    Spanish and Catalan
    Thanks Suzie, you're being of great help.
    What do you think of the following?

    The learning of a foreign language aids the development of this competence when the linguistic models used contain a cultural component. This competence, therefore, not only facilitates expression and communication, but also contributes to a wider perception of, and enrichment by, different realities and productions from the cultural/artistic sphere.
     

    Suzie166

    Member
    English - UK
    I think that sounds clearer and flows more naturally.

    When you talk about 'realities and productions' in the final sentence, what are you referring to?
     

    Kozmiknat

    New Member
    Spanish and Catalan
    I think, what I want to say is:

    ...different cultural/artistic realities and productions.

    Thanks a lot, I realize now how difficult it is to translate.
     
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