From mm surveys, as the one we will ... [sentence structure]

fpnavarr

New Member
Spanish-Chile
Hi,

Could someone help with this. I've received comments that this sentence is not well structured

"From (sub)mm surveys, as the one we will present in Chapter 2, follow-ups of selected
subsamples of submillimeter sources have been studied in greater detail in order to un-
derstand their physical nature"

I'm trying to say that a subsample of submilleter sources have studied with more detail, so it is possible to understand their possible nature.
 
  • entangledbank

    Senior Member
    English - South-East England
    'As' in the first line should be 'such as' or 'like'. 'Such as' is better here, because it more strongly suggests that the study in Chapter 2 is one of those surveys, not just a survey like (similar to) one of them. With that change, the sentence structure is fine. ('Not well structured' is not a very useful comment unless they then explain why not, is it?)
     

    fpnavarr

    New Member
    Spanish-Chile
    Thanks a lot. Yes, indeed "not well structured" is not a very specific comment , but sometimes I get to face them :(
     
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