get the message?

[Railway]

Hi mates

Could you please have a look at this text to find the mistakes? Sure there are a lot

But the most important for me is know if the reader (you in this case) gets the message.

As usual, thanks a lot.

Dear Mr. xxxx,

I am writing to you because last week when I called to Mr. xxxxx I was told that he won’t be back at the company until next week, and we still have some questions about the samples that you sent us. In Mr. xxxx’s last e-mail he informed us that the prices are 10’23 € for the dispensers and 2’6 € for the refills. Does these prices refer to the xxxx dispensers and the xxxx refills or they refer to the yyyyy dispensers and the yyyyyy refills? Whichever the answer is, please send us the prices for the other one also.
We also wonder in what terms we are going to set our collaboration agreement and which is your price/pricing policy. We want to know if the prices you have sent us are fixed and we will work on a commission basis (if this is the case, which is our commission for every dispenser and for every refill we sale) or if these prices are the base and our incomes will come from increasing them.
About the transportation, our idea is that you will deliver your products directly to the clients that we have got to you. By doing this we want to reduce the transportation and storage costs. How big has to be an order to work in this way?
Apart from this questions, if possible, would also be very useful if you could give us some information about where you are commercialising the xxxxx and the yyyyy Dispenser and some data about it in order to know your company better and to make our your experience gathered over the years. We discovered your company and your products in Switzerland, at the Basel airport. In how many countries is xxxxx operating? And what kind of clients are the ones that usually buy the xxxxxx? Could you name your most important clients? We would also be extremely grateful if you could share with us, in case you have, any research you have done about the use of the xxxxxxx. For instance, do you know what is the average use per month of refills for each dispenser? And do you know if the installation of the Toilet Seat Cleaners produce savings in other products such us toilet paper or cleaning products?

So thanks a lot for your time. We are looking forward to hear from you.

 

[viera]

The text is not completely perfect - there are a few minor errors and awkward expressions. But the overall quality is very good and, most important, very clear. I clearly understood all the questions asked and points raised.
Bravo!

 

[Joelline]

Railway, I am putting in bold face anything that you might want to revise:


Dear Mr. xxxx,
I am writing to you because last week when I called to Mr. xxxxx I was told that he won’t be back at the company until next week, and we still have some questions about the samples that you sent us. In Mr. xxxx’s last e-mail he informed us that the prices are 10’23 € for the dispensers and 2’6 € for the refills. Does these prices refer to the xxxx dispensers and the xxxx refills or ???? they refer to the yyyyy dispensers and the yyyyyy refills? Whichever the answer is, please send us the prices for the other one also.

We also wonder in what terms we are going to set our collaboration agreement and which is your price/pricing policy. We want to know if the prices you have sent us are fixed and if we will work on a commission basis (if this is the case, which is our commission for every dispenser and for every refill we sale) or if these prices are the base and our incomes will come from increasing them.

About the transportation, our idea is that you will deliver your products directly to the clients that we have got to you. By doing this we want to reduce the transportation and storage costs. How big has to be an order to work in this way?

Apart from this questions, if possible, it would also be very useful if you could give us some information about where you are commercialising the xxxxx and the yyyyy Dispenser and some data about it in order to know your company better and to make our your experience gathered over the years????. We discovered your company and your products in Switzerland, at the Basel airport. In how many countries is xxxxx operating? And what kind of clients are the ones that usually buy the xxxxxx? Could you name your most important clients? We would also be extremely grateful if you could share with us, in case you have, any research you have done about the use of the xxxxxxx. For instance, do you know what is the average use per month of refills for each dispenser? And do you know if the installation of the Toilet Seat Cleaners produce savings in other products such us toilet paper or cleaning products?


In spite of these errors, I understood all of your questions, and I am sure that Mr. xxxx will also understand what you are saying.

 

[Railway]

Thanks viera

He he he, you really know how to get people's morale high

The text is not completely perfect - there are a few minor errors and awkward expressions. But the overall quality is very good and, most important, very clear. I clearly understood all the questions asked and points raised.
Bravo!