He was a really warm-hearted person, devoting ...

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LQZ

Senior Member
Mandarin
Lei Feng was a really warm-hearted person, devoting his all life to others.
Hi, everyone,:)

The above about a late Chinese hero is from one of my friends. I neither think it is grammatically correct, nor find out why is wrong. Could you clarify it to me? Thanks.

LQZ
 
  • Copyright

    Senior Member
    American English
    The problem is "devoting his all life to others." It would be better rendered as "devoting his entire life to others."
     

    lablady

    Senior Member
    English - USA
    The problem is "devoting his all life to others."
    I agree this is the problem spot, and I agree with Copyright's suggestion.

    If you want to use the same words as the original but are willing to change the order, another option is to write it as: "devoting all his life to others".
     

    LQZ

    Senior Member
    Mandarin
    The problem is "devoting his all life to others." It would be better rendered as "devoting his entire life to others."
    ;)Thank you, Copyright and lablady.

    I tried to reword the original as the following two:

    1 Lei Feng was a really warm-hearted person, who devoted his entire life to others.
    2 Lei Feng was a really warm-hearted person, while he detoved his entire life to others.
    Could you please tell me which one sounds nutural and does't change meaning?
     

    owlman5

    Senior Member
    English-US
    ;)Thank you, Copyright and lablady.

    I tried to reword the original as the following two:



    Could you please tell me which one sounds nutural and does't change meaning?
    #1... definitely not #2. And I personally wouldn't use a comma.
    I agree with Copyright that the comma is needless here with this relative clause. The clause tells us something fundamental about the subject and therefore shouldn't be set off with a comma. The comma in relative clauses or phrases should be reserved for those remarks which aren't fundamental to the subject or object being modified. Here are a couple of examples:
    I don't like the man who insulted me.
    Fred, who lives on the corner of Mulberry Street and Vine Avenue, is my friend.
     
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