Pet names/Terms of Endearment

Discussion in '日本語 (Japanese)' started by Cereth, Aug 14, 2006.

  1. Cereth

    Cereth Senior Member

    language of love
    Hello again!

    I was just wondering if there are any particular words in japanese which can correspond to "sweetie" "honey" "babe/baby" (not akachan), "dearest", "my love" ...etc ..if so, are they commonly used? by whom, where and when?

    And I thank particularly to Flaminius san, Aoyama san, Kamome san, Karuna san, Spiceman san and Santi san for always helping me to understand this difficult but interesting language.
  2. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    Many Japanese know that in the English speaking countries, honeys and
    darling are used directed to their wives and girlsfriends.

    If any Japanese use those words, people will laugh.

    Hiro Sasaki
  3. Anatoli Senior Member

    Melbourne, Australia
    Native: русский (Russian), home country: English
    That is quite an interesting topic if there is enough attention. I know only from learner's perspective that Japanese don't use darling, sweetheart, honey, etc and words of love are not usually pronounced.

    Dictionaries have transliterations of English words of endearment to address loving partners (non-existent in Japanese)
    ダーリン darling
    スイートハート sweetheart
    ハニー honey

    I read discussions about this. I asked a young Japanese lady about this in a Japanese language meet-up. Here's what she said (I summarised in 2 sentences): We, Japanese women, change quicker than Japanese men. We are ready to hear these words but men are not ready to utter them.

    In Japanese culture there is a nice word あなた (anata), which is used by women to address their boyfriends/husbands, which can be translated as "darling".
    So, Japanese men can be addressed nicely, why can't Japanese women have the same?

    My Japanese is not so good but I found a few Japanese movie titles with these words. Among them まかせてダーリン [makasete da-rin] "Leave it to me, darling". I haven't watched it but is there a trend to use these words, or is it in movies only?
  4. Cereth

    Cereth Senior Member

    language of love
    Thank you Hiro and Anatoli...
    I love Japanese language and I really try to understand Nihonjin when it comes to topics like this but I just can´t!!
    Because I know several Japanese men and they use this words in English!! why can´t they do that in their own is so confusing to me...
    I was reading an article about psychology in Japan, in this article was mentioned that many Nihonjin speak in English during the sessions because they feel it is ok to express their feelings in this language but they feel odd saying the same things in Nihongo.....but that is another topic.
  5. Bran Muffin New Member

    New Jersey
    Eng, America
    Maybe men don't say that sort of thing because they are afraid of looking like a homosexual.
  6. Anatoli Senior Member

    Melbourne, Australia
    Native: русский (Russian), home country: English
    I wouldn't say it, Bran Muffin. I wouldn't make any other assumptions too, especially the ones that can hurt people, I'd prefer to hear opinions from Japanese themselves.
  7. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    Among them まかせてダーリン  ; In this case, as " ダーリン ” is a word of
    foreign origin, and it has lost the the original affectionate meaning. It sounds sometime humorous. 私の夫 うちの主人 is too formal and some women say うちの旦那(だんな)、 うちのダーリン。 

    主人というのは master と いう意味もあります。 現在では husband を equal
    partner と考えていますから 少し 抵抗があるのかもしれません。

    旦那も master という意味ですが この言葉は 歴史的背景もあり master の意味が
    薄れます。 第三者には だんなといいますが 夫に対して だんな とは いいません。
    ”うちのだんな”も humorous な 響きがあります。 master だとは 思っていません。 

    あなた 以外に 夫に対して 愛情を示す 適当な言葉が 現在ないのです。 現在模索中
    (もさくちゅう)です。 男性も ”おい”、 ”お前” とは いいにくく、 適当な ことばが
    ないのです。 結婚して 子供が 出来れば ” おとうさん”、 ”あかあさん” といいますが。。 私の友人の奥さんは 外国人ですが 友人を ” おとうさん”と呼んでいます。

    Hiro Sasaki
  8. MarcB Senior Member

    US English
    What about Kimi?
  9. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    A wife will never say Kimi to his husband. A husband may say "Kimi" to his
    wife. But, it is very rare, especially in the Kansai region where I live.

    Hiro Sasaki
  10. MarcB Senior Member

    US English
    Yes I have only heard it as a husband to wife.
  11. toscairn Banned

    メグミ、あるいはメアリーという恋人、または妻がいたとしましょう。Suppose we have a couple, with a girl named Megumi or Mary.

    めーたん!(たん is pretty much babyish!)
    めぐみさん!(a bit "distant")
    めぐちゃん!(more affectionate than "san")

    From here goes more creative,
    めーにゃん(猫好きの人のみ使う!Used only by cat-lovers!)
    めりちん (babyish!)
    めりにこわ (to a Russian girl!)
    めぐ姫 (Princess Megu!)
  12. Cereth

    Cereth Senior Member

    language of love
    Oh Toscairn that was wonderful!!!!!
    Speciallyfor: にゃん because I am a cat -lover!! but I suppose I can´t say to a guy :"Tai-nyan" or "Ak-nyan" right?..... :(
    I guess I have to say those words in English...
    Thank you minna-san!
  13. sneeka2

    sneeka2 Senior Member

    Oh, my Japanese girlfriend occasionally uses a lot of にゃんs on me. Guess it's not too weird. Then again, we don't have cats, and it's probably more of a cute joke. ;)

    One thing I want to ask of my own: What's the deal with あなた(ダーリング) and あなた(〜さん、きみ、お前)? Why is one used as term of endearment and the other one to address somebody? (Sorry Hiro-san, too many Kanji for me to understand your explanation yet :eek: )
  14. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    I feel sorry but I hope that someone at a high level of Japanese proficiency will translate what I've written. This is a matter dificult to
    explain and therefore I've explainted it in Japanesae. My bad translations
    will lead to more complicated missunderstanding.:(

    Hiro Sasaki
  15. toscairn Banned

    I believe the reason why "anata" as term of endearment is always directed from a wife to her husband and not the other way round is a remnant from the feudalistic days in which men dominated over women.

    Cereth, you can make any sentence in 猫語 as long as you end the sentence with -nyan. "Tai-nyan" or "Ak-nyan" is OK, of course!
  16. Cereth

    Cereth Senior Member

    language of love
    Thank yo so much Toscairn! I said to my friend: You are my Tai-nyan and He laughed!! He said it sounds I feel happy ..thank you so much...because I really wanted to say something corny to him in his own language ;)

    Best regards..
  17. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    When I was a primary school boy, we used to call my classmates with
    the family name without adding "san" nor "kun". But, I used to call my
    close friend Tadao as "Taachan". He used to call me Hiroaki chan.

    Girl classmates called me Hiroaki san. There was another classmate
    with the same family name Sasaki. I liked to be called Hiroaki san, not
    sasaki san. It implies affecction and also respect.

    Nowadays, many young girls call their male classmates Tanaka kun, Yoshida kun. But, when I was younger, the girls called their classmates
    and colleagues with the family name + san.

    Kun originally meant "lord". But, about 150 years, young samurai bagan
    calling his friends "xxx kun". and their superior "xxx san". Tha'ts what I
    can notice in the T.V.shows.

    One writer Yoshimoto Giichi said that he is called in more than ten different ways such as Fujimoto sensei, Fujimoto sama, Giichan.
    Giichi-han ( Kansai dilalect ), Fujimoto han (Kansai dialect ). It varies
    according to the degrees of friendness and respect.

    It's quite good for you to invent some affectionate nickname for your
    clase friend.

    Hiro Sasaki
  18. toscairn Banned

    That's a surprise! If a female classmate had called my name with -san not with -kun, I would have worried and think she might be doing it on purpose to show distance from me. I was reminded by your message that one thing you feared in your school days is being addressed with -san by your classmates. "-san" is generally regarded as more polite than "-kun," but "-san" can be cruel to school boys.

    Addressing a person with "-nyan" should only be directed to your beloved person, otherwise people will think you're addressing a cat!
  19. MommaWolf New Member

    English - US
    Hello again...It is my understanding that Japanese people rarely use pet names (at least that is what I've heard for husband-wife relationships). However, my "friend" called me both "kitsune" and "ichigo" ('fox' and 'strawberry', relatively, or so I understand), and I would really like a nice term to use in response to him. In advance, domo arigato gozaimasu.
  20. cheshire

    cheshire Senior Member

    Catholic (Cat-holic, not Catholic)
    How about these: tanuki (狸) or banana (バナナ) ?

    Did you know that tanuki and kitsune are usually associated in Japanese minds?
  21. MommaWolf New Member

    English - US
    How is it exactly that you pronounce バナナ? I'm afraid I don't know Kanji...
  22. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    バナナ is a gairaigo 外来語。 We do not use a kanji for it. We pronouce
    "banana". Sorry, I 've nver given an answer to a question of biginners in
    Japanese. I don't have time to do it. At a higher level, you will be
    able to have me to help you.

    Hiro Sasaki
  23. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    We say 狐(きつね)と狸(たぬき)の化かし合い(ばかしあい ), but a tanuki is
    a humorous animal in many Japanese fables for children. There are
    many shinto temples お稲荷(いなり)さん with stone images of a fox.
    Some people misunderstand that the the foxs are incarnations of

    I think that you can get information on the of 伏見稲荷
    大社( ふしみいなりたいしゃ)

    Hiro Sasaki
  24. Hiro Sasaki Senior Member

    Osaka, Japn
    Japan, Japanese
    Very sorry. I misunderstood and thought that your mail is a personal one
    to me.

    Hiro Sasaki

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