Sniffing specific fruit can help overweight people stop eating much whose...

rapadox

Banned
Slovak & Czech
Good morning,

I am not sure which of these sentences is correct.

A.
Besides that, sniffing specific fruit can help overweight people stop eating much whose normal response to the smell of unhealthy foods like chocolate or pizza was to become hungry and overeat.

B. Besides that, sniffing specific fruit can help overweight people ,whose normal response to the smell of unhealthy foods like chocolate or pizza was to become hungry and overeat, stop eating much .


Thank you for help
 
  • velisarius

    Senior Member
    British English (Sussex)
    A is too awkward. Using the "to infinitive" will make B sound better:

    Sniffing specific fruit can help overweight people, whose normal response to the smell of unhealthy foods like chocolate or pizza was to become hungry and overeat, to refrain from eating too much.
     

    PaulQ

    Banned
    UK
    English - England
    Neither are good sentences - I would mark them as wrong.

    I don’t know what comes before the sentence but “Besides that” is probably wrong, this phrase tends to be spoken informally rather than written.

    I suggest you put the whole sentence in the passive. The new subject should then be “overweight people” qualified by the “whose” clause. This can then be followed by the verb attached to “overweight people”

    stop eating much is wrong – ‘helped to eat less’ is what you should say.

    Sniffing is the wrong verb -> smelling is correct

    I don’t think that you mean “specific” fruit, you probably mean “certain/particular” fruits. (This is a case where fruits in the plural is OK.)

    This will leave you with something like:

    Additionally, overweight people, whose normal response to the smell of unhealthy foods like chocolate or pizza was to become hungry and overeat, can be helped to eat less by smelling certain fruits.

    Much delayed crosspost with velisarius.
     
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