still part projection

< Previous | Next >

gimhee

Senior Member
Korean
I spent 30 minutes trying to understand the underlined sentence...

please teach me the meaning of the sentence..

the background information is that this women went through abortion at 11 weeks.



What I found almost as difficult as the loss was the question of how much I should mourn. Further along in a pregnancy or with the death of a living child, there’s a social berth of understanding. I was in the nebulous first trimester: indeed a baby, but also still part projection where there is no shared handbook. I kept trying to find ways to measure and quantify the amount of sadness I should feel and how long I should sit out.
 
  • anthox

    Senior Member
    English - Northeast US
    This is somewhat unclear to me too, but I'll give it a shot. In the first trimester, the baby is in the very early stages of forming. It is "still part projection" in the sense that its reality and identity are, to a large degree, "projected" or abstractly assigned to it in the mind of the woman/parents. She is making a distinction between the "baby" of the first trimester and a "living child." Since the baby inside her died before developing to "full-child" status, there is no handbook for how to grieve for it.
     

    Parla

    Member Emeritus
    English - US
    Can you tell us where you found this passage, Gimhee?

    Parts of it seem unnatural to me, including what you have underlined. I assume that "no handbook" means that there is no published source to which she can look for guidance (I don't know what "shared" means here), but I don't understand "still part projection". "How long I should sit out" is also puzzling to me.

    And all of this seems to reflect rather complex emotions for a first-trimester abortion. It's just occurred to me, though, that perhaps this was not a deliberate abortion but a spontaneous abortion, also called a miscarriage. Was it? It would perhaps help to know that.

    I wonder if this was perhaps not written by a native speaker of English.
     

    gimhee

    Senior Member
    Korean
    This is somewhat unclear to me too, but I'll give it a shot. In the first trimester, the baby is in the very early stages of forming. It is "still part projection" in the sense that its reality and identity are, to a large degree, "projected" or abstractly assigned to it in the mind of the woman/parents. She is making a distinction between the "baby" of the first trimester and a "living child." Since the baby inside her died before developing to "full-child" status, there is no handbook for how to grieve for it.
    it is very nice of you to explain in this detail.

    thank you so much~!
     

    gimhee

    Senior Member
    Korean
    Can you tell us where you found this passage, Gimhee?

    Parts of it seem unnatural to me, including what you have underlined. I assume that "no handbook" means that there is no published source to which she can look for guidance (I don't know what "shared" means here), but I don't understand "still part projection". "How long I should sit out" is also puzzling to me.

    And all of this seems to reflect rather complex emotions for a first-trimester abortion. It's just occurred to me, though, that perhaps this was not a deliberate abortion but a spontaneous abortion, also called a miscarriage. Was it? It would perhaps help to know that.

    I wonder if this was perhaps not written by a native speaker of English.
    actually... it was written by the native speaker

    I read it from Motherlode blog at NEWYORKTIMES~

    How she write seems to me very indirect

    here is the link to the passage

    http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/...on=U.S.&action=Click&pgtype=Blogs&region=Body
     
    The article is pretty clear; the woman's fetus died; she got an infection (and 'septic shock'); miscarried and almost died.

    The writing seems very native to me.

    gimhee, I'm really not sure what your question is. Several have tried to answer. The situation of losing an early fetus ("baby") is just not well defined or mapped out in any handbook. There are social customs where a farther-along mom 'loses a baby,' i.e., miscarries. There is a baby produced and it may be buried; there may be a funeral. The 11-week dead fetus was not something she wanted to see, yet she mourned, but there are no rules to say 'how long to mourn this near-baby.'
     

    Parla

    Member Emeritus
    English - US
    Thanks for explaining that this was not a deliberate abortion; rather, she is mourning what would have been a wanted child. That explains a great deal. "Part projection", I suppose, could mean that she is partly mourning a child but partly it's the "projection" of a child (an imagined child), since what was lost was in fact not yet a fully formed infant.

    I still don't understand "how long I should sit out". Perhaps "sit out" is an expression in the writer's culture meaning grieve or mourn. I've never heard such an expression in AE.
     

    Myridon

    Senior Member
    English - US
    I still don't understand "how long I should sit out". Perhaps "sit out" is an expression in the writer's culture meaning grieve or mourn. I've never heard such an expression in AE.
    It's used in AE. I imagine it comes from sports. It means to not participate in an activity, to sit on the sidelines.
    Would you like to dance? No thanks, I'll sit this one out. (I don't want to dance right now, but I might when the song changes.)
     
    < Previous | Next >
    Top