traits that fit the stereotype of...

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kaze_hikaru

Senior Member
Korean
source) Atkinson & Hilgards' introduction to psychology 15th edition



At first, participants expected this new acquaintance to be somewhat depressed, fearful, and insecure, traits that fit the stereotype of a former mental patient.



I think it is needed to add a kind of preposition or conjunction...isn't it? Is it common in English?
When I read the book, it's really hard to understand quickly at first. I can guess what traits mean in that sentence....but why the author omitted a connective word? And What an appropriate word can I add to between that sentence?
 
  • exgerman

    Senior Member
    NYC
    English but my first language was German
    There are two problems, no?

    1) The comma before traits is equivalent to a dash to show that there is a break in the grammatical structure, and 2) the use of a noun to sum up a string of adjectives is awkward.

    But such infelicities are frequent in academic prose.
     

    JustKate

    Senior Member
    I think the sentence is fine as written. If you wanted to insert a word before traits, you certainly could, but it's not necessary. Among the possibilities: all traits, all of which are traits, and which are traits.
     

    PaulQ

    Senior Member
    UK
    English - England
    You could write:

    At first, participants expected this new acquaintance to be somewhat depressed, fearful, and insecure, i.e. traits that fit the stereotype of a former mental patient.

    or

    At first, participants expected this new acquaintance to be somewhat depressed, fearful, and insecure, and, by those attributes, I mean traits that fit the stereotype of a former mental patient.

    But neither of the above are necessary at all and the example sentence is perfect as it is.
     
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